A Happy Ending to Diversity Development Learning :)

A Happy Ending to Diversity Development Learning 🙂    

 As this course comes to a close, there are many things that continue to run through my head. There has been so much great information about anti-bias education and how to apply it in the classroom. My only hope is that I am able to adequately and effectively apply it to the children, families, and communities I may serve.

     A goal I would like to set for the early childhood field is that we advocate and educate more on anti-bias education. I think a course like this one should be introduced in undergraduate studies. There are so many things that can begin to be implemented into the classroom as soon as we begin teaching. If undergraduate students would have some of this knowledge it would be a great advancement in the process of reaching anti-bias education.

     I would also like to take this time to thank all of my colleagues that have accompanied me throughout this course. There have been several of you who I have had for several courses and although there has been no direct contact, I know you guys are there supporting me. Thanks! 

Start Seeing Diversity

We must teach children to always keep an open mind towards anti-bias education. 

We Don’t Say Those Words!

We Don’t Say Those Words!

          Researchers have found that between the ages of 2 and 5, children not only become aware of racial differences but begin to make judgments based on that awareness (Pelo, 2008). One day I was babysitting a 5 year old little girl. We were walking around the mall when she spotted this African American man and said, “Look, that man is dirty. He needs a bath.” Luckily the man was not in hearing distance but other people did hear. I quickly turned to her and said that the man was not dirty and that that was just the color of his skin. The little girl did not say anything else and neither did I.

          Although I was not quick to stop her from talking and I didn’t say “we don’t say that”, I also did not explain or have her understand anything. Thinking back on the situation I think she still was confused as to how the man looked and why he looked that way. Her silence after what I said to her might have left more questions in her head than before. Telling her that that was the color of the man’s skin did not answer her train of thought. This little girl was still thinking that the man had not bathed correctly and was dirty.

          Now, as I have been studying about anti-bias education, I think I would have responded to this little girl very differently. Ignoring comments and actions that indicate pre-prejudice gives the child permission to attack another’s identity, and it leaves all children feeling unsafe (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010). First, I would have asked her why she thought that way of the man to see where she was getting her thoughts from. Then, I would have explained in simple language that she could understand that we all have different colored skin but that this did not makes us different from one another but instead it makes us unique. While walking around the mall we could have done an activity where we looked for people that looked different than us and then talk about how they were different and how they were the same from us. Bringing clarity to her misconception that African American people are “dirty” and need a bath would hopefully have her understand the concept of different races.

References:

Derman-Sparks, L., & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: NAEYC.

Pelo, A. (Ed.) (2008). Rethinking early childhood education. Milwaukee, WI: Rethinking Schools. 

Influences on Children

Influences on Children

          This week we have been looking at how children develop their personal identity and how their ideas and views on gender and race are affected by the people and places that surround them. Many children spend more hours in childcare than they do in their own homes. I think early childhood centers should include literature, pictures, dramatic play materials and so much more that help children learn, relate, and feel comfortable with the various family dynamics.

          There are now an estimated one million children being raised by gay or lesbian parents and most books are now being written to inform on these topics (Gilmore & Bell, 2006). Even if there are no gay or lesbian families at your center or school, it is still very important for children to know how to respect and understand these different life and family styles. Avoiding conversations and not providing children with information that can help them evolve and have a better understanding for gay and/or lesbian families can be a form of sexism. We must help our children be equal and understanding of all family structures. If there are students with gay or lesbian family structures at your school or center, seeing their own family portrayed through literature can increase their confidence as well as their motivation (Gilmore & Bell, 2006).    

          In my classroom last year I had a student that I considered a “tomboy”. I felt comfortable calling her that because she considered herself like that and had communicated to me that it was okay for me to refer to her that way. I never said it to insult her or degrade her in any way. After this week’s resources I have realized that even if the student did not mind being referred to as a “tomboy”, it is not something that is okay. Ann Pelo discusses gender identity in the book Rethinking Early Childhood Education and brings up a very good point. She shares a story where a colleague points out that just because a girl is athletic and embraces full-body play over princess play, it doesn’t make her any less of a girl and shouldn’t be subjected to such names as “tomboy”. Sharing these ideas and experiences with all students can help them have a broader mind about gender identity and how they consider themselves to be. Knowing that they don’t need to fit perfectly into one stereotype of gender can be comforting and empowering. I have definitely started seeing gender identity in a totally different way. Hopefully with these new skills I will be able to help my students have a more defined and strong gender identity.  

References:

Gilmore, D. P., & Bell, K. (2006). We Are Family: Using Diverse Family Structure Literature with Children. Reading Horizons, 46(4).

Pelo, A. (Ed.). (2008). Rethinking early childhood education. Milwaukee, WI: Rethinking Schools. 

Team Building and Collaboration

Team Building and Collaboration

          Every year we have to create a closing ceremony at the end of the school year with all of the students from 1^st to 5^th grade. All of the teachers are assigned a role and are in charge of doing whatever is necessary for that role. The closing ceremony consists of elaborate sceneries, dances, musical performances, and drama acts. Every year we dread this part of the year because it is very stressful and because there is always so much to be done. The good part is that all of my staff members work collaboratively, with excitement, and eagerness.

          Last year we pulled of such a great show that the same night we were receiving emails of appreciation and many praises from all of the parents. I believe that when a group works eagerly with each other, everyone respects each other, and everything comes out right, those are the groups that have a harder goodbye. When we see each other again after the kids are already on vacation, we like to sit around the teacher’s lounge and talk about the night and what worked really well and what we could possibly change for the following year. Besides this group of coworkers, I had never had any type of adjourning process within a group. In all other groups I have been a part of, when the project or task was complete everyone would go back to their normal lives and not talk about anything.

                Adjourning I feel is important because it helps you assess the group and their efforts as well as the process that was done. Sharing ideas and experiences of the group is a great way to build to be part of better groups and more effective group work. Since we do not physically interact much with the people within this master’s class, I don’t think adjourning from this group will be very difficult. Although we do share a lot with each other, there is something special that happens when you work with someone face to face. Our closing thought at the end of each course I feel is a great little way to say thanks and move on.  

Conflict Management

Conflict Management 

          I am currently in an argument with my boyfriend`s ex-girlfriend (and mother of his child). My friends and I call it `baby momma drama`. This woman is constantly calling me and telling me all of these negative things about my boyfriend as well as insulting me and calling me names. Although this is a very difficult circumstance to be in, I have been trying to get better at managing her and her arguments. This week I have learned about trying to not be judgmental and looking at the argument from a ¨outsiders¨ view. From reading the principles for NVC, I am trying very hard to be respectful when talking to her as well as showing her understanding and empathy from being in her situation. She is very immature when she speaks which makes it difficult to respect someone is talking in a `baby talk` tone of voice. I will also try to suggest better ways for her to overcome the hardship she is going through. The most important part that I am have been focusing on during all of this is respect. It has been hard for me to maintain that respect because of her vocabulary and hatred towards me. I will continue to try and be the nigger person and `kill her with kindness` as they say.  

           I know this is very hard and that this is not the best position to be in but I have no hard feelings towards her and wish she would just move on and leave us alone.

          Speaking with my colleagues, I noticed that all of them mentioned mutual respect when communicating with others. When dealing with conflicts, some of them rather just walk away from the situation while another confronts them but with much respect as well as an open mind. The one that approaches conflict says that what works for her is that she is not afraid of being wrong. If the other person brings a clear point to the table and makes her realize her mistake, she is okay with backing down. When I mentioned to them the NVC principles, they all agreed that separating your feelings from the argument at hand would be very difficult but that it would be a very good strategy. Many times we let our feelings overcome the sentiment of the argument and make us say and do things we might not mean to.

Ways I communicate

Ways I communicate

          In this week’s evaluations about our communication skills, I was a little surprised by how I was rated. The funny thing is that I was surprised by the fact that others rated me almost exactly the same way that I rated myself. The only section where others rated me differently was in communication anxiety. I think there was a lower level of anxiety when others rated me because they really cannot tell how I feel on the inside before speaking in public or to a group. I also think I hide my fears very well. Although it might look like I am calmed and relaxed, my heart beats faster and I get the nervous bladder.

            Another thing that surprised me was that others rated me the same as I rated myself in verbal aggressiveness. Many times I don’t think about what I say before I say it. I am eager to get my point across and just say what is on my mind. Also, many of the questions on the survey depended on the environment and the people I am communicating with.

           This week I learned a little about myself and, the questions on the survey made me think about the way I speak to others. Through the results I received from the surveys I realized that my listening skills are people oriented, I am very trusting of others, and build emotional relationships which can interfere with proper judgment. Also, through the questions in the surveys, I realized that I need to be more aware of other people’s feelings and viewpoints before I try and reason or attack their point.  I feel comfortable speaking in public although it might frighten me at times.

Variation in Communication

Variation in Communication

          Since beginning this communication course, I have become more aware of how I communicate with others. I have realized that I do communicate differently with people of different groups. With my colleagues and friends I am more relaxed, my vocabulary changes, and I might make jokes or ¨risky¨comments 😉 When speaking to my classroom parents or my boss, I am more careful as to how I stand, eye contact, and proper vocabulary.

          I also feel like I speak differently when speaking to my Hispanic colleagues and friends than when I talk to my Caucasian friends and coworkers. With Hispanics I feel more comfortable being myself and saying things without them getting offended. Many people here sya things with a double meaning. It has been the case where my foreign coworkers get offended by something said when the rest of the group understands it was said just joking around.

            I feel like I can be a more effective communicator if I work on my listening skills, eye contact, and the platinum rule.

            When people are speaking to me, I have the bad habit of thinking about what comment or point I want to make once they finish and not really listening attentively. I know that is an area I need to work on.

            Also, when in a conversation I tend to look around at my surroundings or look down to my phone or anything else to distract me. I know that I don´t do it to be rude but the constant eye contact is a little intimidating to me and sometimes makes me feel uncomfortable. So, although I know it makes me uncomfortable, I need to work on eye contact to be able to really focus on the conversation at hand.

            Lastly, the plantinum rule will help me in all occasions and situations where I might be having a conversation or any type of dialogue with someone. All of these strategies will hopefully guide me in being a more effective and respectful communicator. 

TV Clip. An assignment on communication perceptions.

          The activity that we were assigned for this blog was to watch a TV clip once with no sound and then with the sound turned on. We had to answer some questions based on what we were witnessing.

 

• What do you think the characters’ relationships are based on the ways in which they are communicating?

 

          While watching the video clip, it looks like there is a mother and daughter at a restaurant. I think they are mother and daughter because there is a big age gap between them and they seem very comfortable with each other.

 

• What are they feeling and expressing based on the nonverbal behavior you are observing?

 

          It seems both women are arguing. They both have a fierce look on their face and their hands are waving back and forth. The one who I believe is the daughter breaks eye contact easily and looks around all the time. The older lady looks very sternly at the younger one and never breaks eye contact. The younger lady crosses her arms across her chest and leans back in her chair giving the impression that she is not interested in what the older woman has to say.

 

Watching the show with the sound turned on.

 

• What assumptions did you make about the characters and plot based on the ways in which you interpreted the communication you observed?

 

          Because of their age difference I assumed they were mother and daughter but I was wrong. It was a mother and her son`s girlfriend. They were arguing because the girl wants the son to leave his mother`s house and the mother refuses to allow him. Their body language clearly shows they were arguing.

 

• Would your assumptions have been more correct if you had been watching a show you knew well?

 

Yes. I would have been able to know who the characters were, what the problem was, and what they were arguing about. Either way it was very interesting to watch.

 

          Doing this activity has brought much attention to two different things for me. The first is recognizing that nonverbal communication such as body language and facial gestures tells a lot about the type of conversation that is happening. The second is that you can´t make assumptions about the first thing you see. Just as I thought the relationship between the two ladies were mother and daughter, it turned out to be a mother and young lady with no personal relation. This was a great activity to do.  

Communication Skills

          Communication Skills

          Someone that I feel has very good communication skills is a coworker named Carolina. Carolina is one of our school’s psychologists. When she speaks to you individually or in a group setting, she makes you feel comfortable and she also is fluent and confident in what she says. When she calls you into a meeting she is prepared with notes that she would like to go over, she looks at you in the eye, and she explains everything very clearly. When Carolina is finished talking, she allows time to repeat something you might not have understood or if you have any questions. Also, when you are the person speaking, she is not writing or looking at her phone or busy with any other distraction, she looks at you straight in the eye and gives you her undivided attention. If I could adapt any behaviors of hers, I would like to be able to give someone my undivided attention. When having a conversation with someone or a group I tend to interrupt with ideas and comments when someone is speaking instead of waiting until they are finished. Being able to wait until the other person has finished and listening intently is something that I will continue to work towards because it shows respect for the other person and what they have to say.